Habits are hot. Self-help articles extol the power of habits and books on the topic sell by the millions. Yet, like many pop psychology topics, the conventional wisdom about the effectiveness and application of habits is frequently outdated, misapplied, or flat out wrong. Building habits to change behavior the right way can be a wonderful tool to improve your life. But false notions about what habits are and what they can do can backfire.
Read MoreEarly risers get a lot of good press: They are supposedly more productive and possibly better problem solvers. But after a month of forcing myself out of bed at 5 a.m., I learned that getting up early isn’t always the best thing for you. I’m a morning person, and most days I’m out of bed by 5:45 a.m. I usually have 15 minutes before the rest of my household starts to wake, and I use this time to enjoy a cup of tea as well as the stillness of the morning.
Read MoreYou’re in the middle of a heated discussion–or fine, let’s just call it an argument–and the person whom you’re trying convince seems unable or unwilling to grasp your point of view. What should you do? For starters, you should realize that your odds aren’t exactly superb. Belief change, as psychologist and Fast Company contributor Art Markman put it, is frequently “a war of attrition. There’s usually no one argument that can suddenly get someone to see the light.” Still, some fascinating research suggests that reframing your ideas can boost your opponent’s receptiveness to them. Here’s how it works.
Read MoreThere are two big unknowns in all of our lives right now: What’s going to happen with the COVID-19 pandemic, and what it will mean for the economy. If we enter a post-pandemic recession (or are already in a mid-pandemic recession), what will that mean for our jobs and livelihoods—and what should we be doing financially to prepare?
Read MoreA cluttered computer doesn’t just look ugly, it’s also expensive. For one, there are cognitive costs. A study by researchers at Princeton University found people performed poorly on cognitive tasks when objects in their field of vision were in disarray as opposed to neatly arranged. The same effect applies to digital environments according to a study published in the academic journal, Behaviour & Information Technology. Unsurprisingly, our brains have a tougher time finding things when they are positioned in a disorganized manner.
Read MoreOur paradoxical longing for intimacy and independence is a diamagnetic force — it pulls us toward togetherness and simultaneously repels us from it with a mighty magnet that, if unskillfully handled, can rupture a relationship and break a heart. Under this unforgiving magnetism, it becomes an act of superhuman strength and self-transcendence to give space to the other when all one wants is closeness. And yet this difficult act may be the very thing — perhaps the only thing — that saves the relationship over and over.
Read MoreUnexpected events or shocks disrupt our habitual routines, jolt us out of our comfort zones, and lead us to ask big questions about what matters and what is worth doing. It’s no wonder, then, that during the current pandemic, many people are rethinking their careers. But is this really the right time? Even for those of us lucky enough not to be sick, caring for others who are sick, or scrambling to make ends meet, the pandemic has increased uncertainty and caught us unprepared — psychologically, financially, and infrastructurally. The situation feels threatening.
Read More“It’s a common belief that your first reaction is the most honest, but I disagree. Your first reaction is usually outdated. Either it’s an answer you came up with long ago and now use instead of thinking, or it’s triggering a knee-jerk emotional response to something that happened long ago.”
Read MoreReaching any goal requires motivation, self-discipline, and commitment. But where do those things come from? Many people see these as personality traits. Some people are motivated, others are lazy. Other people recognize that they are sometimes lazy and sometimes motivated. So they add a little nuance and say that it depends on the pursuit.
Read MoreHere’s the most important thing I learned while writing a book on running and mental health: In clinical studies, regular aerobic exercise is as effective as antidepressants in reducing symptoms of mild to moderate depression. And that’s not just because moving might help you get into shape and feel better about yourself.
Read MoreWhether you want to be a Jeopardy! champion or just need to remember where you parked your car, here are 11 things you can do right now to turn your mind from a sieve into a steel trap.
Read MoreSometimes the measure of an idea’s success isn’t how much it stands out, but how well it has blended into the background. The zipper doesn’t tend to call much attention to itself, but it can be found stitched into our jeans, jackets, pillow covers, handbags, luggage, and countless other items. It’s become indispensable and ubiquitous. One estimate, Marketplace noted, puts the number of zippers the US consumes annually at 4.5 billion. “That’s 14 zippers for every American per year,” it said.
Read MoreNo, “humble narcissism” is not an oxymoron; it’s a combination of qualities that the best leaders and companies have. Organizational psychologist Adam Grant explains why. Who would you rather work for: a narcissistic leader or a humble leader?
The answer is more complicated than you think.
In a Fortune 100 company, researchers studied whether customer service employees were more productive under narcissistic or humble leaders. The least effective bosses were narcissists — their employees were more likely to spend time surfing the Internet and taking long breaks. Employees with humble bosses were a bit more productive: they fielded more customer service calls and took fewer breaks. But the best leaders weren’t humble or narcissistic.
Read MoreLate last month, a photo circulated of delivery drivers crowding around Carbone, a Michelin-starred Greenwich Village restaurant, waiting to pick up $32 rigatoni and bring it to people who were safely ensconced in their apartment. A police officer, attempting to spread out the crowd, reportedly said, “I know you guys are just out here trying to make money. I personally don’t give a shit!” The poor got socially close, it seems, so that the rich could socially distance.
Read MorePhysical presence doesn’t always equate to mental presence. You could be sitting at your desk but more preoccupied with a home repair than the assignment at hand, or you could be at the kitchen table thinking more about the proposal you have to finish than the people eating dinner with you. That’s why transitions from work mode to personal mode are so essential. And you have to make an especially intentional effort on these transitions when you work from home because you don’t have the natural change of context cues.
Read MoreWe often have these types of thoughts multiple times a day. The root of this problem is our quick judgment. Humans are very fast thinkers. But how fast do we even think? Scientists have quantified the speed of light and sound, but when it comes to thoughts, it’s not that easily measured. Researchers that did experiments with measuring the speed of thought, found the following: Thoughts can be generated and acted upon within 150 milliseconds.
Read MoreMost of us have warped views of how we spend our time, Duncan says. “If you don’t see it on paper staring at you in the face, you won’t realize that you spend too much time on Facebook, or that you have the same people interrupting you all the time, asking you the same questions,” she says. Spend a week keeping a time log. Write down what you’re doing, how long it’s taking you, and who is interrupting you and what they wanted. “Because the biggest time-management mistake people make is not realizing how much time they waste.
Read MoreThe only problem? It was not written by Fitzgerald; its true author is Nick Farriella, who had written it as a parody for McSweeney’s earlier this month. However, for those of you who crave an actual Lost Generation quarantine story, you’re in luck. Please allow me to entertain you with the true story of how Ernest Hemingway was once quarantined not only with his wife and sick toddler, but also his mistress. He actually took quite nicely to it.
Read MoreLet’s be honest here. If you’re currently not enjoying your life, and you’re not waking up every morning with a sense of excitement, you need to do something about it. You deserve to live a good life. The people in your life deserve that as well. In fact, we all deserve that. No one wants to live or work with a pessimist. And in this article, I want to share one idea with you that has made a tremendous impact on the quality of my life.
Read MoreLike many families have recently, ours scheduled a virtual happy hour the other night. It was full of the same sarcastic jokes and crossing conversations we’d have at a family dinner, only it was all through screens. For an hour or so, there was laughter and relief. The next day, my brother-in-law texted to ask what time happy hour would start. I didn’t realize it at the time, but what we’d done is enter into a ritual as a way to cope with the anxiety and grief produced by the current pandemic. Rituals, it turns out, are a powerful human mechanism for managing extreme emotions and stress, and we should be leaning on them now.
Read More
